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| Ever find out about something that you've lived through but have no memory of it? I mean, beyond ppl blacking out while drinking or something like that, but an actual repressed memory. I'm just waiting to be told "April Fools!"
How do I not remember? Will haunting memories start coming back to me? Does this change anything? Who else knew? Have they also forgotten? And most importantly, WHAT THE FUCK?!?
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| So Bil has tagged me for this "5 things you may not know about me" deal, and I'm pretty sure I'll get yelled at if I don't do it. Plus, it was great fun to read the last couple ppl's answers. I knew everything on Bil's list, and some of you know some of mine, but I guess that's why they're things you MAY not know. So here goes:
1. I have two completely irrational fears: lawn gnomes and eyes. No joke. Well, it's not so much a FEAR of eyes-- they intrigue me and I love staring into ppl's eyes, but I cannot handle any sort of eye pain, especially for other ppl. Even when they claim to not actually be in any pain. An optometrist once told me that I'm "simply overly sympathetic." I freak out when I see anyone else has red eyes for any reason, is crying, touches their own eyes, gets too near someone else's eyes, puts in eye drops, or even TALKS about eye problems. I can't look my boss Julien in the eye because he has that whole white cloud roaming over the iris thing going on. Maybe like a cataract. I try not to look. Sometimes I think other ppl's allergies hurt me more than them once I notice their eyes are irritated. It's a problem.
Now, the lawn gnome thing... Dez & I think that phobia started w/ an episode of "Are You Afraid of the Dark." I just keep imagining lawn gnomes coming alive at night & wreaking havoc in the neighborhood. In my mind, they are pure evil. Watch out, they might kill you! Or tie you up, torture you and steal all your stuff. A couple years ago my mother jokingly gave me a real lawn gnome for Christmas. I felt so guilty about hating a present that I took it back to the dorms with me, but kept it hidden in the closet after the first few sleepless nights. It's now on my parents' porch, and every time I walk in or out of their house, I get a huge urge to kick the damn thing.
2. When I start to fall asleep, I start dreaming long before I lose consciousness. This makes for some hilarious lectures. I'll still hear and understand what the professor is saying, but I'll see some crazy shit. Sometimes the ppl in front of me start dancing, sometimes organic molecules start acting things out, and this morning a particularly nasty gang of reverse transcriptases and DNA polymerase 1's started bullying some cDNA into building a new library inside the Rancho Cucamonga library, but back in the day when it was in the Lion's Center. Go figure. I blame Will for ditching class today and not keeping me awake.
This dreaming thing also confuses me far too often about whether events and conversations actually took place or not. I usually just have to ask someone.
3. A huge chunk of my childhood was devoted to softball. I was a pitcher, and I was good at it. I quit around the end of Jr. High, when I got fed up w/ some ppl (one in particular) and needed a little break, which, naturally, has lasted, what, 7 years now? The thing is, I never really got it out of my head how much I loved to play, and how I was one of the best around. I had this dream of being in the Olympics. 2004 was my year. The summer after graduating high school I'd be on the USA team, helping to make it the best year of my life. Well, when the summer of '04 rolled around, I watched just about every game of the series on tv, even though many of them started at like 3am. USA dominated hardcore-- we're talking undefeated, shut outs, and the Mercy Rule. I loved watching them, but it was also so sad. I could have been one of them. I even knew a couple of them, having played against them as kids. I just sat on the couch thinking that I had failed.
4. My family hosted exchange students almost every summer from my kindergarten days to early high school. I always got kicked out of my bedroom and had to move into the office. We took in Japanese high school girls mostly, but I think it was when I got to jr. high we switched to Finnish girls. My mom became the coordinator/teacher lady for the Fins & Swedes our last couple years of being a "host family." We also took in a Japanese & a German teacher/chaperone once. I always looked forward to those couple of weeks in the summer-- I looked at it as a great excuse to go to all the amusement parks & ball games & Scandia & stuff w/out having to beg my parents.
5. I have ridden in an ambulance and been rushed to the hospital. My dad thought I had broken my neck. It was during a softball game. There was a little...collision... at the plate. Basically, the other team's coach told his buffest girl not to slide (Dad was our manager and was pissed for months), so I ended up on my back, and when asked if I was ok, I answered that my neck hurt. Therefore, I was ordered not to move and was eventually put in a huge neck brace and taken away on a gurney. Unfortunately for my story, the neck brace prohibited me from seeing anything other than a small section of the ceiling, and the ambulance driver was afraid of hurting me further, so they drove slowly and didn't even turn on the sirens! Lame. No broken bones though, luckily. Just a huge gash in my elbow & a very stiff & sore neck.
I tag both Ben and my roomie Jotl! You're both it now!
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| You know you have issues when everyone sends you this link:
http://personals.aol.com/article/_a/do-you-keep-falling-for-jerks/20060811140909990001
It just gets funnier everytime someone new sends it to me.
Quote of the morning:
"Hahahahahaha, he just called himself a jerk!" ~jotl
p.s., John Mayer is a god among men. It's true.
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| If I ever pull something so stupid again, we won't stay friends. How we still are, I'll never know. What is wrong w/ me? I need a hug--- from someone who actually cares about me.
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| "Update, slackfest!"
How could I not update after that? Just give me time...
Here ya go, Trev. 
Looking back at my last few entries, I realized that the last public one was in February, and the only ones since then were merely a couple AIM conversations that I'm ashamed to say I saved, in case I ever want to re-read one of the ONLY big fights I've ever had w/ a friend... but, luckily, that was short lived and is long over with. And I'm guilty of saving a few very select AIM conversations. For the record, I also have the first conversation I ever had w/ my roomie Jotl saved. But that one's great for a lot of laughs.
Well, anyways, my finals are this Fri & Sat (that's right, I'm not out of school yet. Enough already, you semester punks!) and then I get a 3 week break. I'll spend most of that back down in Rancho, and hopefully this will be a long enough stay for me to see all the ppl that I want to but never seem to be able to catch or fit in on my weekend trips. I have a few big plans for this time, but there are many ppl I still need to get in touch w/. Then I'm coming back up to nor-cal for my summer intership @ some seed genetics place. I need to master the stick shift by then; I'm stealing Dad's car.
This last weekend (the one that ended YESTERDAY) was one of my weekend so-cal trips when I had no time. There was a cloud of sorrow around AL, for Andrea Hartman's funeral. Such a tragedy... And only a couple weeks before she graduates H.S. I hope her family gets through this eventually... I feel so horrible for Travis!
But there was also joy in town.
Get this---- I went down there for COURTNEY'S WEDDING. That's right, one of my best friends from h.s. has gotten married! I mean, I know other ppl roughly my age who are already married, but most of them are more of BIL'S age. Five years older. A few slightly younger than him. Hell, I've even heard from a couple kids a year younger than ME who say they're now married. But this one was different. It hit much closer to home (w/ the exception of Bil & Devon, who I was fully prepared for and absurdly excited about  ) on such short notice. Courtney's one of my best friends, and although she was a year ahead of me in school, she's still only 20 years old (her husband, Will, was in my grade). They only had about one month to plan it all. Incredible. I was amazed at how perfectly beautiful it turned out! It marks the start of MY CLOSE FRIENDS GETTING MARRIED. That's kind of a scary thought. The real kicker, though, is that they're moving to Alaska in a week. ALASKA! She's gonna freeze to death! I'm going to miss her! He's in the military and being transfered up there, so she's going w/ him. So they're marriend and moving away. It's all so fast and unbelievable. So, the best of luck to the blissful couple! I LOVE YOU COURTNEY!
Oh, which reminds me, while in AL for those upcoming 3 weeks, I'll be going to the opening night of The Last 5 Years in Pasadena. I can't wait! But I'm afraid--- every time I listen to the soundtrack, I cry. Is that really lame? Probably. But whatever, it's true. Certain parts I just can't handle anymore, especially now w/ the lyric "I swear to God I'll never understand/ How you can stand there, straight and tall/ And see I'm crying, and not do anything at all." Yeah. It's a sad musical. Funny at times, sweet at times, but depressing also. So we'll see how that goes. I'm really excited though.
I'll leave you now w/ some pics from this weekend. Therefore, mostly of the wedding.
    
   
And, YES, those last few are DARIN ERSTAD of the Angels playing a rehab assignment at the Quakes! Hahaha, we were so giddy that night....
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